Wednesday, April 3, 2013

TWO! Not So Fun Life-Lessons (for everyone)

If you are scraped and bruised from a hard journey as an entrepreneur, there really aren't a lot of heart-warming things to say from the experience except when you do boil it down, there are two very important facts that will remain with you;  (one is a good thing... hidden in the rubble of your life).

Kool-Aid Rehab....#1. FACT; You will learn a tremendous amount of new things ... especially if you have wasted a lot of hard-earned money and valuable time.  These 'lessons' really are the best type-in-life-to-learn... just horrible when you are going through it .... but lasting in the way of gained wise knowledge - to never go there again!  You will also be amazed by how smart you will be when you're helping others ....

 .....and that, I might add, is exactly what you should be doing whenever possible....  (period)!


Kool-Aid Rehab....#2. FACT; The MOST brutal lesson of all... you will discover (even at an older age) just exactly who your true friends are.  It can be shocking too!  When you think you know someone well....find yourself having a hell-of-a-time-in-life, and you will see the true colors of someone's character even through the blaze of a fire!

Yes, I know people are busy and you're too sensitive, stressed out and exhausted....and you're probably not 'front & center' to them because you are busy working all the time to fix the problem... bla, bla, bla... I'm not going to make any excuses.

The surprise comes when people previously engaged in your life, (when things are just spiffy)  to very quickly disappear out of your life and the idea of even inquiring about 'how-things-are-going' becomes a smell-of -stress to them which they prefer to not sniff.    It's really sad.. when you experience 'good-bye and good luck' (or I'll see you again when you are back to 'spiffy') ....  Entrepreneurial life or a sudden job loss to some people, is like a cancer-odor which this variety of 'friend' concludes to be contagious and could possibly bring them down.... (not that you're going there either!)

 .... even a whiff of this stuff will get people running!  The irony is're not looking for sympathy (to drag them down) ....just a little normal emotional support and the idea that you have not lost your value to the friendship .... but these days, that is just too much to ask.   That message really is the headline here, and it's hard to be prepared for what comes with that, it's a very lonely isolated feeling (like you're not already feeling bad enough from the stress of  your situation).

ok, so here is the 'good' in all that....

.... just like when you are in a tough job search there will be wonderful compassionate people who will appear in your life (fortunately)  -   they will help you in ways you dream of and they quickly become first on your A- list!  (as in Angel :)   It's usually a person who
has lived through a very unpleasant phase of life and they know how it feels - and have learned from that lesson.  The emotional support becomes invaluable to you and it will never be forgotten.  Sometimes they even help you with your business  or  job search and to side-bar this message;  thank you to my support group - you know who you are!

As the old saying goes....KARMA IS A BITCH (it really is) and with that 'lesson' I would suggest checking in with people in your circle of friends and do your best to lend a helping hand ... many in this rotten economy are experiencing unimaginable horrendous times at all sorts of levels. Few have not been touched by the financial and real estate repercussions of today.  It still continues to be a difficult 'recovery'. 

As another way of helping and for those who need to be told; ... view 'Networking' (for whatever reason) not as a silly cliché, but as a very important 'tool' not to be ignored or taken for granted because..... you could very quickly find yourself on the other side too.   Beyond networking... just being a good friend, a compassionate ear is also equally important and you know it's the right thing to do.  (that's the Mother in me speaking!)  It doesn't take much time to show a little concern.

I wish this post had a more humorous side, but this is Kool-aid Rehab....the unvarnished truth from this experience  ......    and  to note, sometimes it really sucks.

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About Me- I'm everywhere!

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anywhere and everywhere, USA, Illinois, United States
I'm a sassy, very distracted older mom...with lots of wild stories (and rants) about my family and life...Daughter 20, college student, sassy, unpredictable, violin playing, animal enthusiast...Son, 17 video addict, Chess playing-star / trombone player...husband (old, tired, chronically stressed and impatient, but a good sport nonetheless) The underbelly of life for me; I’m a bright eyed ‘entrepreneur’ – just now completing Kool-aid Rehab a frightening 12 step process to figure out what I am doing with my life. On the home front, we have a gang of animals that keep the place lively too! 'Emma', dirty ungroomed Sheepdog, 'Lollipop' a smart Border Collie/Chow Chow also referred to as 'Daddy's Little Fatty', 2 cats; one eyed 'Winky' and emotionally disturbed- beyond crabby ....'Babycakes' (it's complicated,) 1 bird 'Tutu', and finally 'Templeton' (a.k.a. Little Shit)- a teeny dog who loves to 'run' .... more trouble than all put together and dumb as a stick. but we love him! :)